Toilet Paper Shortage, Febreeze & Pissin a River

I’m not sure.  It might just be me.  But, bathroom etiquette has taken a dive right down the bowl.

Why exactly can’t people put a new roll of toilet paper on the little toilet paper holder when the roll is empty?  Seriously, it’s within reach.  Go ahead, throw that empty little cardboard whirlie in the trash and put a nice new fluffy roll on there.  It seems like I’m always going in there (at home, at work, at my friend’s, at my Dad’s place) to an empty roll…  Conspiracy? 

Yet another poo peave near and dear to my fart is the smell of Febreeze or any other fake flowery scent.  Not that those roses in a can are completely useless.  But, is it really necessary to spray half a can of it after taking a crap?  Do folks really think that it helps the stink?  Trust me, it does not.  

This seems to be more of a chick thing than a guy thing…  I mean, guys really don’t give a crap if a green fog follows them from the potty room…  But women… Good Lord.  For some reason when a girl comes out after making a poo, it’s not just the poo smell… it’s rose covered poo.  For the love of God, please, if you must spray, make it a quick burst of air fresh… not the whole can. 

Lastly, and this is a direct command to my step-son, PLEASE close the damn door when you take a wiz.  I’m all the way down the hall, with the TV blaring some brilliant show on History or Discovery or someother nerdy network… and I can still hear you pissin.  What’s with that?  Why can’t you take the .22 seconds that it takes to close the door before you whip it out and let it fly?  Really.