Slutty, Skanky & Into S & M

Does anybody else think Barbie has turned into a slut in her middle age?

I mean, she’s always had awesome boobs that are obviously implants because, let’s face it, no chick has real boobs that big and perky after the age of 35 without a little help.

As a dreamin type kid, I had a shitpot of Barbie Dolls in my toybox, closet, floor, under the bed…

And more Barbie clothes than 10283764 Barbie’s could every be dressed up in for fashion show.

But back in the day all of the clothes that old-skool Barbie had was fairly tasteful and Barbie was appropriately covered.   No leg.  No ass.  No boobs…

Back in the day, Barbie was all moral and stuff.  Holding hands with Ken…  Cruisin her Barbie Mobile…

Nowdays, Barbie has turned into a total skank.

No wonder all these little girls out there are all about looking 25 when they are only 11.

Trust me, I have experience here.

My kids never did dig the Barbie dolls, but I have a niece that does.

And the girl dresses just like her Barbie.

All I can say about that is this…

The day I see the child dressed like this…

I’m gonna slap her mother right upside the head.

Is it just me, or has Barbie turned into total skank?

On the bright side….  Loookie!!!

I found me a Catscratch Karaoke Barbie….

Ain’t she cool?


You kids have a great weekend now, ya hear?

21 Responses to “Slutty, Skanky & Into S & M”

  1. karaoke Barbie! Woot! I’m gonna have to find that for my little girl.

    And yeah, Barbie’s not the only skanky doll on the block anymore.

  2. Oh yea, she is so cool we will do that duet… sometime. lol I guess it’s safe to say tht karaoke Barbie Rocks!

  3. I’m afraid I can’t offer any opinions about Barbie. Even Helena can’t help me – she had some Barbies when she was little, but she painted and decapitated them, and that was that…

  4. Barbie and those skanky Bratz… Yeah, back in my day, Barbie in her swimsuit was about as risque as it got. LOL.

  5. Sure karaoke Barbie looks a little more pure, but she seems to have something shoved in her butt.

  6. What about Caribou Barbie? She’s no slut.

  7. I prefer the skank Barbie.

  8. whatigotsofar Says:

    Barbie has had to compete with the Bratz dolls and so the slut-factor has had to increase accordingly.

    But she’s got a new hat.

  9. I have wanted to slap a few mothers upside the head in my time.

    My 18 yr old was in the 2nd grade when the Spice Girls were huge… and there were little 7 and 8 year olds wearing the teeny tops and the dressup platform heels, etc. Two years later, in the 4th grade, this one girl was wearing hooker shoes with her long (spaghetti strap) fuschia velour gown to the damn christmas carol concert.

    Yes, moms do end up letting their little girls look like that. It’s because…

    they’re STUPID!

  10. Barbie is a hoo-ah…and don’t EVEN get me started on the BRATZ/SLUTZ dolls.

  11. Yeah, the fashion of Barbies is a little weird compared with how it was when I was a kid in the early 80s. I STILL have a suitcase full of Barbie clothes somewhere in my attic. Yep, a suitcase…you and I could’ve had a hayday back then! LOL.
    …But I know you’ve seen Bratz Dolls. OMG. I’ve dubbed them the “Ghetto Girlz”. ((rolls eyes))

  12. I’m glad you brought this up! I’ve always thought she had some work done on her boobies!

  13. “I so much wish I could place a comment here today.”
    -Practically Joe

    On behalf of Rodney, the Practically Wisdom Blog Team is visiting everyone on the list of BLOGs he follows. He would like you to know that he greatly enjoys reading your posts and commenting on them.

    Unfortunately Rodney, sorry, we mean Practically Joe, has been heavily sedated for a long period of time now, following an accident which left him with two broken ribs and a number of minor injuries.

    He has been coming along fine and asked the team to post an account of the incident, which was posted on Sunday, 11/23.

    We have great expectations that he shall return soon, as good as new. He wishes you and every blogger a Great Thanksgiving Holiday.
    For those not in the USA … Have a great week!

    Thank You.
    The Practically Wisdom Blog Team.

  14. catscratch Says:

    Jen- If you should find Karaoke Barbie, you should get 2…. I’ll give you the address where to ship mine 🙂

    Jose- No duets with Barbie, pal. I’d get awfully jealous. 😉

    Brian- Helena is my new hero… Decapitating Barbies. Yay!

    ETW- Yah, her suits were pretty tame back them.

    Ron- She moonlights as a pole dancer, but it’s a secret.

    Bob- How could I have missed Caribou Barbie????

    AngryMan- Honestly, I do too, just don’t tell anybody.

    WhatiGotSoFar- Pretty thick competition out there nowdays… and I adore that hat.

    Frac- Yah, we should go to the mall together to critique all the sluts in training… and get their mama’s names.

    Meleah- I agree ghetto bratz get on my nerves too.

    Michelle- We would have had a blast… and we could have opened a Barbie Boutique with all our moral looking Barbiewear.

    Bella- Yep. Remember. You heard it here first, girl.

    Joe- OMG. Get well soon, darlin and then kick that ladder’s ass!

  15. Thanks Diva, I just spent 45 minutes staring at the skank Barbie right above karaoke Barbie & fantisizing…it’s the Fishnet Stockings, they get me every time…Barbie’s a bad girl and I love me a GOOD BAD GIRL !

    Oh karaoke Barbie is cool but she needs to show more plastic, but hey thats just one dirty ole perverts opinion. 😉

  16. I’m sorry. I like dirty barbie. wholsome barbie was a tease.

  17. I love that bumper sticker:
    I wanna be Barbie
    That Bitch has Everything

    Seriously though, it is pretty sad isn’t it? The fishnet stockings and the Stripper heels? Have you seen Bratz Dolls? They are ten times worse! I won’t buy my daughter anything to wear that looks like I’d wear it too. I fault the parents for letting their Tweens dress like mini-future-clubbers. As the parent of an 8 year old it sends chills up my spine!

  18. Barbie has turned into a little whore. I had no idea she was slutting around like this. I guess I have to start paying more attention to this stuff since I have my first little on the way, and definitely will not let my daughter – if we do have a daughter – wear any of those outfits. Now if I have a son and he wants to dress like Barbie that is OK. Have a Happy Thanksgiving.

  19. Barbie is HOT!!! Timeless, always relevant, NEVER skanky. Strippers need dolls too . . .

  20. Everybody knows if you want a real dirty whore you go for the Bratz.

    Perhaps I’ve said too much.

  21. bondage barbie… man… oddly we were playing with barbies this weekend at the neighbors house… no bandage barbie but lots of naked and missing limbs barbies…

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