Shoot the Beercan, Jump the mudhole & Chase the Chicken

My title today reminds me of the Bugs Bunny cartoon where he is the Square Dance Caller for the Hatfields and McCoys.  

If I was in charge of the Olympic Games…. these would be a few of them. 

– Shoot the beercan from the fence.  Object of the game is to drink a case of beer.  The first to finish their case of cold brew would then go set the empty cans on a fence in the shape of a pyramid.  The first one to blow that pyramid down with a Smith & Wesson Special wins.

– Jump the mudhole.  Anyone can participate.  It’s not gender specific.  However, long legs and a good stride would be a plus.  Object of the game is to start from a dead stance, run 40 yards and leap over progressively big mudholes.  One who makes it over all mudholes with the least amount of mud caked on them wins.  Simple, no?

– Chase the Chicken.  Again, anyone can participate.  Agility would be in one’s favor.  Object of the game is contestants will be in a large pen.  Chickens would be released.  The person who could catch the most chickens and put them in their pen in a 30 minute period wins.   Amusing to me.  I’ve seen chickens being chased.

So, I’m not in charge.  That’s pretty obvious.  Because one of the games are official Olympic Games is Badminton  (Hell ya, babe. Eat that birdie!)    Is Badminton difficult enough to be a real sport? I could be wrong, and it may just be tough.

Let’s celebrate the U.S. Olympic Team Hotties.  Shall we?

James Blake… Tennis Hottie

 

Misty May… Beach Volleyball Hottie

Aaron Perisol… Men’s Swimming Hottie

Natalie Coughlin…  Women’s Swimming Hottie

Merrill Moses… Water Polo Hottie

 

Mens Swimming hero…. Michael Phelps.  New world record holder.  You go, Michael!

 

So, anyway,  today marks the day of my 200th post.  Aren’t you just thrilled?

Here are a few things I’ve bitched, ranted and raved about over the past year and a half or so….

There alot of really lame shit in most of the posts, but I’ve had fun and that is the only damn thing that matters.

Cheerio, boys and girlies!

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36 Responses to “Shoot the Beercan, Jump the mudhole & Chase the Chicken”

  1. Congrats on 200 posts!!!

    I’d nominate Noodling as an Olympic Sport. Men’s, women’s, and team noodling divisions.

  2. Congrats on the 200th post!!! Don’t forget strip beach volleyball for the womens team!! Jello wrestling for the Gold Medal! Olympic Pole Dancing!! Oh I can think these up all day long, but they just get more and more sexually oriented 😉

  3. Jesus God, Merrill Moses looks like the water polo TEAM.

  4. wooo hooooo your 200th post and filled with Olympic Hotness. What a way to celebrate!

    xxoo

  5. Happy 200th!

    Apparently I have more catching up to do!

  6. Merrill Moses… *yummy*

    Why do I not know of him?

  7. Well, finally someone is thinking of some exciting games for the coveted competition. Congratulations on your 200th post, I am a new reader of yours but I am hooked, it’s like you almost had me at hello. lol And then to top it off you are a fellow karaokerer… shit! Is that a word. Oh well, it works for me. By the way, being Mexican I sing with an accent, it’s quite funny if I think about it. he he. Oh by the way, I may not be in the Olympics but I am in the Olympic Spirit, so… you may add me into your list of hotties.

  8. rantingdiva Says:

    Bob- I don’t think I’d Noodle. I’m scared of fishies.

    Ron- YES! Perv Olympics. I’m there!!

    M-A-W- Yah, come to think about it, he’s scary intense.

    Meleah- Hot is always a good way to go, girl!

    Metalmom- I’m digging backward through your archive now.

  9. You forgot…
    Body Noises….you know the longest loudest….that sorta thing
    LOL

  10. Congratulations!

    I’m glad I discovered you in time to celebrate.

    Now where’s the bar?

  11. Happy 200th post.

    Chasing a chicken would be the funniest event ever I assume. Let’s all start a petition.

  12. rantingdiva Says:

    Mel- They’re all pretty hot, huh?

    Jose- My best friend’s hubby is mexican and the Elvis king of Karaoke. He has that little accent which makes it really cool to listen to.

  13. Congrats on the 200th post!! I need to hit your archives!

  14. rantingdiva Says:

    Jules- I’d reign supreme if it was a farting contest.

    MJ- The bar is well equipped should you make it to TN

    Sully- I think we should do that.

  15. Congratulations with the 200. The best way you can celebrate is to write another 200.

    I’ll have a go at the beer one, though I can’t fire a gun, but then everyone will be drunk anyway…

    The rest all look like great spectator sports…

  16. congrats for sure!!! two hundrend down and two thousand to go…

    i watched the lamest Olympic sport at lunch on tues… “hand ball”? wtf? these guys run up a short court, dribble once and throw the ball in a net?!?!? wow, missed that golden sport opportunity in high school… there should be section of each sport where they have to smoke.

    tennis and smoking
    swimming and smoking
    hurdles and smoking

    just a thought!

  17. I must be the only person actually NOT watching the Olympics. Perhaps I should rethink that.

    Congratulations on 200!

  18. They do have shooting events at the Olympics, but they’re way to fancy and uppity about it. And there’s no beer drinking involved. Beer should always be involved in shooting, darts and golf.

    One thing about the Olympics is that there are lots of very beautiful people competing.

  19. hehehe
    I could win the beer can one for sure
    the others require non sexual motion, so I’m out for those.

    I thought you were choking chickens over here at first!

  20. I see you have Olympic fever too. keep checking back to my ideas Cat.

    What you have described are the Redneck Games held every summer in Minto, Ontario. (http://www.canoe.ca/Travel/Canada/Ontario/2008/07/27/6286411-sun.html)

  21. rantingdiva Says:

    Brian- With enough beer I’m sure a BB gun would do.

    IV- You got my vote if you present it to the committee.

    Mel- Actually I’m not watching either. I just Googled Olympic Hotties.

    Jay- That’s why I’m all for Redneck Games.

    Sage- Beer and sex games would be very nice.

    Thorn- Oh hell to the yah. I’m there.

  22. I’m going to go crazy if I don’t start seeing some real Olympic sports. I can’t take another day of gymnastics, diving, and men’s beach volleyball. Give me more Walsh and May, basketball, softball, and naked Walsh and May.

  23. Your olympic game suggestions had me cracking up. I would add Intense Midget Throwing to the mix.

  24. Oh mylanta, James Blake !! I need a cold shower

    #1

  25. Congrats on #200! Unfortunately I just found your blog today, and I’m far too lazy to read through your entire archives. So I’ll just pretend that time didn’t exist until I showed up. It’s what Jesus would do.

  26. rantingdiva Says:

    Angryman- Agreed.

    Diva- Oh hell ya. Moooog is a candidate.

    Philly- I know. I torment myself.

    Jon- Everything Jesus does is ok by me. We’ll start over at one.

  27. I’ve never played Chase the Chicken…..But I’m a Pro at Chokin the Chicken!

  28. Congrats on the 200 darlin and I’d watch your olympic games hell I’d participate.

  29. Today I watched baseball as an Olympic sport. You know what? It’s just as boring on an Olympic scale as it is on a “professional” scale. Tomorrow I hear they are going to have the Olympic Paint Drying time trials. I can hardly fucking wait.

  30. I thought the same thing about the badmitton until Trish told me they hit them around 200 mph.

    Geeeezus.

    Speaking of 200….

    Congrats girl!!

  31. They’re almost hot enough for me not to resent them for being hot AND talented.

  32. rantingdiva Says:

    Moe- TMI alert, bwaaahahahaaha.

    Trukindog- I would totally expect you to be a team capitan, brother.

    Mike- I wait with eager anticipation along with you!

    Slick- Thanks, my man!

    Jack- I drool over a few of them, then I forget to resent.

  33. dopeypants Says:

    Congrats on your 200th post! I would send you a cake or beer or whatever people get for their 200th blog post, but damnit, I’m all out of everything here except some words and a few cigarette butts, if that tickles your fancy.

  34. im going to go back and read the one about big girl panties..the title alone cracked me up..
    have you WATCHED water polo?..all they do is try to drown each other…and the event that i wished i could have seen was the sheep shearing event..really..

  35. oh, and it’s not just the american’s that are hot..them aussie’s are not hard on the eyes and on my my the italians…hot dang

  36. Congrats on 200!

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