ABC’s of Catscratch ~ A & B

This post brought to you by the letters A and B, boys and girls.

ANAL

Not anal sex, you perverts.  Anal retentive.  I know you have to be finding that totally hard to believe and it has to be blowing your mind right now.  But, alas, it’s true.

Addicted to…….   BLOGGING. 

I will make a mountain out of a mole hill and blog about you and how silly you are whether you are some random asshat on the road, a dork in my local dive, my stepson, my daughter, my mom, my husband, my friend.

I blog good times, bad times, road trips, political bullcaca (not politics, but the stupid shit politicians do), celebreties, hotties, airport chaos, trips to the zoo and anything embarrassing I can think of.

Addicted to…..    INK

 

I’ve got my fair share of tattoos. 

Right ankle is the sign for tranquility.

Left ankle is my daughters’ names surrounded by musical notes.

Left shoulder was done in honor of my Man.  The first song he ever gave to me on CD was You Are My Flower by Flatt & Scruggs.

And my trampie stampie.  My daddy thinks it says “Daddy’s Girl”.

 

 

 ANIMATED

One of my girlfriends, yet another Pirate, has said I am animated…. could it be because of these?

Scared Diva.  I think somebody must have said penis or something.

 Dorky Diva with Darth.

Scarey Diva with Daddy and Ma

 

Forced to be perverted Diva… dig that crazy eye shadow.

  

BITCHY!!!!

If ever there was a code word for Catscratch Diva that could describe my ass to a total T…

 I claim, love it and be it.

Whether it be the man I’m with now, or the man I was with first, or somebody in between…

I am who I am because, me being the co-dependant dumb shit I am, allow whoever I happen to be with at the time shape the bitch in which I metamorphizize into.

Kinda like a butterfly.  Awww.

Yes, friends and neighbors, the rumors are true. 

I obtain the ability and super-sonic powers to turn into a raving, stabbing-eyed bitch in less than 3 seconds.

This tends to happen mostly in my place of residence on those people that I call family.

The Boy & Miss A have this perfected talent when it comes to bringing it out.

My BFF in the whole world, Mz. Rodriquez, well she pussy-foots around and tends to say I’m just open, honest, straight-forward.    I know what she really means.

Yes, I tend to say things with out that pleasantly sweet, pleasing to the palate sugary shit.  I have a real tendency to cut to the chase and be as real as a bitch can be.

*********************************

In closing today, I offer you blogs from the scratchin’ post that begin (of course)

with the letters  A and B.

Acheiving New Balance

Angryman

Bittersweet Confusion

Blogitude

Buzzardbilly

 

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21 Responses to “ABC’s of Catscratch ~ A & B”

  1. Ha ha ha ha!!! I loved this post! And love the photos of you!! This is dedicated to us bitches!!!

  2. Any tattoos on your tits? Thanks for the link!!!

  3. Hey Girl! Love the tramp stamps! My day is coming…I think!

    Anyways, you’ve been tagged! Come on over to my blog to check it out.

    You can thank me later!

    HAHA.

  4. My wife goes from zero to bitch pretty fast too. I think she actually breaks the sound barrier when she does.

  5. You’re my kinda people!

  6. Have you considered Slim Fast?

  7. I love the photos!!! You are adorable and hilarious.

    What DOES the trampie stampie say, if not ‘daddy’s girl’???

    sooooo curious…

  8. rantingdiva Says:

    RC- I adore the magnet. I think I’ll order us both one!!

    Angryman- No tats on the tits… they’d hit the floor in the next 30 years.

    Bella- Whatcha gonna get??? I’ll be right over!

    Mike- To my knowledge, I’ve only broken the sound barrier once.

    GroovyMom- Sweeet! You made my day!

    Dyck- Kiss my fat, white ass, Doll.

    Krissy- It says ‘kinky bitch’. You likey?

  9. I have it on good authority that the tramp stamp says “Insert here!”

  10. “I am who I am because, me being the co-dependant dumb shit I am, allow whoever I happen to be with at the time shape the bitch in which I metamorphizize into.”
    A-HAHAHAHAHAAHA!!! I may have this made into a BUMPER STICKER!!!
    I love you Diva!!! AND your beautiful big white ass!!!
    xo

  11. No reallly. THAT is the quote of the fricken YEAR!!!!!

  12. Was it something I said??

  13. Haha .. those “animated” photos are really funny!

  14. 2.1 seconds?

    What takes you so long?

  15. I’m not into anal anything…. really!
    I am very animated , mostly when you piss me off, and Bitch, well I think you wont find another quite like me, ask the family, my friends and the telemarketers that call and piss me off…
    Bitch, it’s not just a word, it’s an institution…
    Hugs~~
    J

  16. “Daddy’s Girl” HA…More like AIM HERE!

  17. rantingdiva Says:

    For the record, it says something along the lines of Kinky Bitch.

  18. rantingdiva Says:

    Mushy- Me thinks me shall have that added for good measure.

    Olga- O.M.G. I’m being quoted?? Amazing!!!

    Olga- Do I get royalties from the sales???????

    Dyck- Slimfast doesn’t work. I’m using Exlax.

    Jay- I’m animated alright. LOL.

    MJ- Well, I have exactly perfected my speed out of the gate. That’s the hang up.

    Judy- Me either, but I’m anal retentive all the way.

    Jam- Close, very close.

  19. well goddang I’m still miffed about being called a pervert at the top of the post!
    sheeeeeeeeeesh
    love the ink
    that Tramp stamp surely says Sage is the F-in man!

  20. busykitty Says:

    YOu are a riot! I love getting inked! Gonna get another one real soon going down my torso. When are you getting your next one?

  21. Oh, I read the C & D post first and thought the letters were chosen just because they were your blog initials! D-oh!

    Great pictures of you and your friends!

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