Ode to My Life As of Today

Bare with me people.  I’m depressed.   So, rather than cry about it, I have written a special little ditty to try to make light of it all.  Now, lets get on with it.

Ode to My Life As of Today

My life is in the shitter,

No smiles, no laughs, it true.

I’m not trying to be a buzz kill,

I’m really just feeling blue……

My sex life before Big T was swell,

Not that I was a slut.

I was playin naughty with a fella named Darth,

He did what he did very well…..

No more can I talk on the tele,

No more can I leave when I want,

No more can I walk even out of the room,

Like a ghost Big T is set to haunt.

You see my friends I still feel young,

I like to go out and drink and sing.

I married a man who is like my grandpa,

There are no more fun things….

 

So, there ya have it.  My life as it stands right now. 

Married an old man who won’t do shit but watch TV, eat slices of American Cheese on crackers, bitch, moan and complain.    I think the bitch, moan and complain part is fueled by the fact that it turns me off and if I’m turned off then he doesn’t have to put out.

Great.

This my friends is driving me crazy.  I suppose the moral of the story is…. Be very, very careful what you wish for…. it might come true and turn out to be exactly the opposite of what you originally thought it would be.

 

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19 Responses to “Ode to My Life As of Today”

  1. Adultery is always an option 😉 Just Kidding.. Hope things get better.

  2. Hmmm… perhaps you could grate some Viagra onto the American cheese. At least you will be getting a little even if you are forced to stay in.

  3. Get a stripper pole installed in the bedroom?

  4. I’m with Ron, slip that mutha some miracle drugs!

  5. Well that sucks hind tit!

    Go without’em!

    Meet your friends and tell him to meet you there if he wants, otherwise, see ya later!

  6. Damn.

    You downed yourself.

    Give your suspenders a snap girl, and get back into the game.

    He’ll either be dragged by your enthusiasm into the fray,
    or you’ll learn to have fun by yourself,

    and in that case, he’ll sit back and drown in despair,
    wondering why he didn’t join the cause.

  7. Cat, this bums me out. You are still young and virile and if Big T. wont give it to you…well, I’m just saying. Most any other man probably will.

    Sometimes just knowing that is enough to bring you out of a slump.

    Sometimes not.

    What’s he say when you try and talk to him about it?

    I love the poem, by the way.

  8. Wow … I’ve never had a low sex drive … maybe you should cancel the cable and don’t buy crackers and cheese for a while.

    Problem is you need romance and forplay and he probably just wants to get busy.

    Sorry to hear it.

    ~Jef

  9. I’m feeling sad for you. I know what you’re saying, I was in a marriage like that. You can’t hope for change in a person when it comes down to a man acting older than he is. I guess it’s a lose lose situation….You have to make sure that you are willing to live the rest of your life feeling the way you do. It’s up to you girl. ~~Hugs and Sugar~~

  10. Married an old man who won’t do shit but watch TV, eat slices of American Cheese on crackers, bitch, moan and complain. I think the bitch, moan and complain part is fueled by the fact that it turns me off and if I’m turned off then he doesn’t have to put out.

    Man, this sounds like me and Wifey except that we love pissing each other off. It leads to wonderful makeup sex. Well, that probably doesn’t do much for you . . . (mentally backtracks to try and cheer up/console fellow blogger) . . .
    Um, um . . .
    GOT IT!!! At least you’re not studying for the bar exam right now!!!
    (hopes that covers up for his mistake)

  11. Oh my….this problem seems to be going around lately…..
    Take care of YOURSELF lady….in the end that’s all ya got anyway!
    XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOX

  12. Awwwww man, that sucks.

    Some days, I know the feeling. Only my wife doesn’t like American cheese. She prefers swiss.

  13. Wow, sweetie. I hope you two can work things out and either get him to be different or learn to love going out w/ your other friends, doing things with them, etc. I don’t really know what to say, other than I’m sorry and I hope things get better, asap! Love ya!

  14. Yup some miracle drugs are called for..:))

  15. that sux some big ole donkey gonadulars.
    Good luck sexy I’m pulling for you.

  16. Take it from someone who has been there: life is to short to live a life of quiet desperation. Opt for happiness. If it’s not there, make some changes.

  17. Umm.. maybe he is dealing with some depression and doesn’t realize it? Guys never seem to think that crap happens to them too. Was he like this before you got married? If not, then seriously consider how to figure out (or help him figure out) if that’s what’s wrong. Honest to goodness, diagnoseable depression usually affects desire for sex.

    Will keep you in my thoughts!

  18. OH man! That sucks!

    Girl, either get yourself a good vibrator or some Viagra! And a little Internet porn may do him (and you) some good. Hang tough, K?

  19. Somehow i missed the point. Probably lost in translation 🙂 Anyway … nice blog to visit.

    cheers, Prematurely!!

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