Let A Little Sunshine In


Okay, so I’ve been piss and vinegar for the past little bit. 

 I really thought I was gonna blow a fuse today and totally short circuit.  If you’re bored and you have nothing better to do and you are wondering why I’m trying my best to be kittens & cottonballs*1*.

I hate that friggin feeling.  It makes me wanna throw up a little in my mouth..

 Anyway, I shut down the PC at the office with that feeling of dread in the pit of my stomach, “Fuck.  Time to leave the sanctuary of my professional domicile and go to the hottest pits of hell wherein the demons of puberty and hormones live.”

 So, I got to the car.  It somehow managed to turn sunny and warm today. 


 I actually rode down the road with the windows down and some sweet 80s tunes pipin from the sub-woofer*2*.

 By the time I was about a mile from home, I was feeling a little better.  I’d heard a couple mellow-me-out-before-I-scream tunes, I’d thrown a shout out to the BIG GUY*3*, and I was breathin easier.

When I pulled in the driveway, Big T was taking a rest.  He’d been busy de-Christmas redneckin the bushes because I’d been bitchin about being the only house in the hood with lights left anywhere on the premisis.*4*

He stopped everything he was doing and came and gave me a big, long hug like a bear. 

With that man, good keeps getting better.  I might bitch and I might moan about certain things, but he really treats me like a Queen.  Queen Diva.

So, I came in the house, changed my clothes… a t-shirt and shorts!!!  YeS!!!! Sunshine and warmth.  Spring!  If only in typical Tennessee fashion and if only it will last for a few days, I’d be a happy bitch. 

With every weed I pulled from the flowerbeds left neglected by the previous owner.  I was envisioning ripping out one single hair from the heads of the hormone buckets I call my teenagers.

 Yes, friends and neighbors.  If you’re gonna explode, find your sunshine.


*1* Term enlisted by Mike which 100% demonstrates what the world would be like it all was perfect.

*2*Actually factory shitty ass speakers, but… ya know.

*3* The ONE and only Jesus Christ (yes, I’m a heathen but I’m also a believer).

*4* Every mutt in the neighborhood pisses in our bushes and I wasn’t gonna take ’em down… it’ll be Christmas in 9 months again anyway.  Why bother?


12 Responses to “Let A Little Sunshine In”

  1. Aww finally feeling better, phew! I was afraid I was going to have to smother you with my ginormous boobs!

  2. I took down the Christmas lights around my windows just a couple of weeks ago. They were the only decorations I put up, but it was just too much effort to take them down. haha

  3. Please pass the tator chips??? …. ohh, too salty!
    Hey Diva, I am jealous. I want to don some summer apparel as well 🙂

  4. roadredneck Says:

    seeing I’m hip deep in snow I’m friggin jealous your wearing shorts…:))))

  5. You still had Christmas lights up? Hee hee.

  6. Sound like my mom sounded during the times where I know she wanted to pull every strand of hair from my heads. LOL.

  7. nosjunkie Says:

    as bad as your kids are please always remember that my mom had it wors

  8. “Fuck. Time to leave the sanctuary of my professional domicile and go to the hottest pits of hell wherein the demons of puberty and hormones live.”

    so THATS why the women in my office like it HERE so much. Yikes!

  9. rantingdiva Says:

    You can still smother me with ginormous boobage, Leighann, really you can…

    Jay- Yay! You’re as redneck as I am!!!

    Speedy- I’m in a skirt & flippyflops to day!! 72 degrees, baby!

    Robert- I wish you sunshine!

    Fab- Queen redneck here. He took em down, I didn’t.

    Don- One hair at a time I’d like to make them bald. I really would.

    Lee- I’m getting paid back for all the shit I did to my mom, I just know it.

    Meleah- Oh yah. I get off at 5 and 9 time out of 10 I’m still in my office after 6.

  10. Hmmmm, these chips kinda taste like asparagus….

    My child and I have an agreement, he is going to stay little, and I wont kill him when he is 15….it works for us.

  11. rantingdiva Says:

    Banishment to a dark closet at 15 is mandatory, Jam!!

  12. damn. people cant PAY me to stay late.

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